Games

We know you’re bored. You’ve already finished the crossword puzzle and Sudoku in both the LA Times and the New York Times and it’s only 10:30 on Monday morning. You’ve exhausted all of your snide remarks on trueOFFICEconfessions.com. You can’t go to lunch yet nor can you call it a day. So instead of sighing and freaking out there in your tiny, drab cubicle. Check out one of these games that we have painstakingly vetted on your behalf (we are bored at work too).

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the X is for EXTREME!

You have played it before, but NEVER like this. Adult Swim’s Extreme Rock, Paper, Scissors (the ‘X’ is for EXTREME!) lets you exercise workplace demons by crushing your opponents like Borat’s wife with a slew of special moves, upgrades and a serious metal-laden soundtrack. On three now, 1…2…SHOOT!

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If you enjoyed playing with toy boats in the bathtub back before you knew better than to defecate on your playground, you will love Destroyer. It is the Battleship of our youth, evolved. Now you can take on unknown opponents from their cubicles far, far away. With a missile cruiser, destroyer, submarine and helicopter, you take on anyone you like via Shockwave.com’s multiplayer network, although you do need to be a member (ahem, here’s more of my personal information big brother!). Seriously, it’s worth it. Check it out. Do it.

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“Cubicle Freakout”

Well fine, you feel bad slacking off, wasting company resources playing online games. Everyone needs some stress relief, that proverbial pressure valve, that allows you to keep your sanity despite your fourteen bosses insisting on getting those TPS reports signed. Anyone looking? Take 2 and and get it out. You’ll thank us for it.

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For you heretics out there who think it is just fine to defile the characters of the Book, may I suggest Bible Fight. You can pick to be Jesus, Eve, Mary (presumably the Virgin not the Whore), Moses, Noah or Satan. As you progress you will unlock even more characters to blaspheme. Yes it’s sick, twisted, and disrespectful, but you still have 5 hours left at work. WWJD? He’d fight, that’s what.

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One response

29 05 2008

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